It is April already? It is already April! Is it?
This is the special-est month for me in the year, because of course, my birthday falls in this month and not to mention it is summer holiday time! Call me childish, but give me some credit for still getting excited about a birthday. Most people on the wrong side of thirty nowadays would rather mope around the birthday month - that it lasts just till their fortieth comes around, is another matter.
I am telling you, the only time I really dreaded my birthday was when I was about to turn 30. Sort of momentous, isn't it? The big 3-0 ;) Anyways, now that the milestone has been crossed I don't worry too much about the age than as much about the size. My size, that is. The bitter weight gain-weight loss yo-yo that I have been on since getting pregnant has left me at a size I would rather not mention. But here is the big damning revelation - I am currently the exact same weight as I was when I was 9 months (+ a few days) pregnant! How I reached here is a really looooooong story, whittled down for your perusal below :
Chapter 1. Pregnancy, Childbirth and first year of baby : We went to Zurich when I was 7 months pregnant as I have mentioned before. So I happily gained a few extra kilos(extra to the ones I should have ideally put on) in the last few months of pregnancy because of the extra (yummy) food that I suddenly had access to - read- cheese, bread, baked goodies and err..chocolate!! When baby was born I did lose some weight and went on a spree of weird diets to help me lose the extra tyres. Here may I thank Dr.Atkin, Grapefruit and boiled egg, Beyonce Knowles aka Master Cleanse and a host of weight loss supplements readily available at the friendly neighbourhood Pharmacy.
Chapter 2. Baby's second and third year: This period was a stressful period due to various reasons that I will not get into here. But will suffice to say, that emotional eater had by now become my middle name, so much so that it had come and 'round'ly sat on my mid-section! During this time I made my acquaintance with Messrs.Fat Loss for Idiots (Google it up), Beyond Calories, Raw food chicas, The VLCC institute of whip-thin rude nutritionists and sweaty hot pulse weight loss machines, Personal trainers, Bolly-robics, Plain Vanilla Bollywood dancing, Altitude Chambers (Reduced oxygen and all that jazz), and my favourite thus far Dr.Dukan (I even bought the special oat bran from Paris!). This was also the time when things like Acai Berry, flaxseed oil, Sibutramine and other such exotics entered my medical cabinet. And also a thing called Eltroxin - for the lil mister Thyroid gland who had apparently gone stuporous during my pregnancy. Long story, short : If you showed me a new 'sure-fire' method of weight loss, I would be sure to give it a go! Sigh! Weight gained during this period cancelled out any weight loss I had had after delivery!
Chapter 3. Year Four and running : Well I am not the one running. Weight loss efforts have been pared down after a very real and very painful 'gym' injury (Yes, one of the few times that I was there!). I tried to learn swimming, but - cough, cough - after a near drowning experience, have well - given up on that for the time being.
Now that leaves me fair and round at round one! Zero Points :(
What should I do now? This year, as in the last few years, as my birthday huffs and puffs its way around I am again lost for answers while the adipose cells are possibly settling down with the popcorn or whatever it is that makes them stick to me like fevicol ka mazboot jod!
So I have set myself a small challenge - only for the month of April. What it is I am not going to say here. If I meet it -swell. If I don't then well, there is another not so funny blog post coming your way! Wish me luck - and, oh - a Happy-go-lightly Birthday!
